While happy couples are busy planning their mushy, over-the-top Kiss Day moments on February 13, you’re sitting there, scrolling, wondering if you should reinstall that dating app.
Hold up. Who says you need a significant other to celebrate? Here’s a list of things you can kiss instead.
1. Kiss Your Pet
Your furry companion deserves some affection. Your dog will probably reciprocate with a sloppy, enthusiastic lick. Your cat, on the other hand, will tolerate your existence for approximately 3.2 seconds before walking away. Either way, they’re still better than your last situationship.
2. Kiss Your Coffee Mug
Your morning coffee is the real MVP (most valued player), the one that sees you at your worst and still loves you unconditionally. Kiss that mug like you mean it because caffeine has never let you down (except that one time it gave you the jitters before an important Zoom call).
3. Kiss The Gym Gains
Who needs a valentine when you have biceps that are finally starting to show? Blow a kiss to your reflection, flex a little, and remind yourself that self-love is the most important love of all.
4. Kiss Your Favourite Snack (Because It Deserves Respect)
Whether it’s a gooey chocolate brownie or a family-size bag of chips you totally intended to share, your favourite snack is always there for you. Give it a kiss before you devour it, because relationships fade, but calories are forever.
5. Kiss Your Phone Screen
You checked your notifications 27 times today, hoping for that one message. It didn’t come, but it almost did. So go ahead, smooch your phone screen, just don’t get fingerprints all over it. You’ll be back to checking it in five minutes.
6. Kiss Your Pillow
Let’s face it... your pillow has been there through it all. The late-night overthinking, the ugly crying sessions, and the mornings when you hit snooze for the 10th time. Hug it, kiss it and appreciate the real MVP in your life.
8. Kiss the Idea of “The One” Goodbye
Left on read? Matched with someone who has “Looking for something casual” in their bio? Saw your ex happily engaged? Kiss those dating app disasters goodbye. Who needs “the one” when you can have the many? Focus on yourself, flirt shamelessly, and enjoy the freedom of being single.
9. Kiss Your Own Hand
When all else fails, be your own Prince (or Princess) Charming. Give your hand a peck and whisper sweet nothings to yourself. You’re fabulous, you’re thriving, and your standards are just too high for mere mortals.
So there you have it, our list of options that, frankly, won't ghost you. Embrace the freedom, laugh at the absurdity of it all. At least you won’t have to deal with someone awkwardly missing your lips and kissing your nose instead.
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