Breaking up is never easy and dealing with it is all the more painful. Whether it is a mutual decision or one person decides to walk out, it is emotionally overwhelming. Sadness, anger, confusion, guilt, all emotions are parallelly haunting, to find answers about how to move on. Stalking on social media, speaking to your ex's friends, nothing works. This all is normal, as they say, the break-up has three stages, grief, overcoming and then guilt, which is the most difficult part, as we often blame ourselves for the things that didn't go right. But, the other side of the story is – if someone wants to stay, they will do what it takes to keep the relationship alive, otherwise, it was not meant to. While healing takes time, there are ways you can try and cope with your painful emotions. Once managed, you emerge stronger than before, as a breakup teaches you more than anything else in life. Here's your guide by Clinical Psychologist Bhupendra Sharma to manage your emotions after a breakup.
Allow yourself to grieve
There's no harm in grieving and feeling the loss. Rather, it is important to acknowledge your emotions, whatever they may be. Allow yourself enough time and permission to feel sad, angry, or even relieved. Not grieving and distracting yourself will take longer for healing.
Set boundaries
It is natural to check your ex's social media accounts or revisit their texts and emails. You may also feel the urge to contact them to stay in touch. However, giving yourself the space to heal is important. Remind yourself how crucial it is for you to overcome without thinking about the past with your ex. If needed, block your ex from all the platforms for your peace of mind.
Focus on self-care
Take time out for yourself. Do things that make you feel good and happy. Whether it is going out with friends heading for a solo trip in the mountains picking up that long-left dance class or working out, these activities will help you engage positively. They are also the best way to heal yourself. Spending time with loved ones can also help give you a direction ahead. Taking care of yourself physically and emotionally will boost your confidence and morale.
Find new goals
While grieving for the past relationship, it is difficult to move our attention to something else, as you may be consumed by the thought of your recent relationship. However, use this time for yourself. Learn a new skill, pick up a new hobby or focus on personal or professional growth. At times, a breakup can be an opportunity for rediscovery and self-improvement.
Support yourself and have a perspective.
Reach out to friends and family, or if needed take counselling or therapy from a professional. A strong communication or venting out can help in the process of healing. Your friends and therapist will give you another perspective to your breakup which can help process those traumatic feelings and move forward while taking care of yourself.
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