Remember the days when dating was a cryptic game of mixed signals, vague emojis and reading between the lines? Welcome to 2025, where singles have collectively decided they’ve had enough of that nonsense. Enter loud looking: the dating trend where people are actually saying what they want instead of dropping hints and hoping their match has mind-reading abilities.
According to Tinder’s Year in Swipe report, “Looking for...” was the top bio mention of the year, meaning that people are done with the days of playing it cool. Loud looking means putting your intentions front and centre, whether you’re after a relationship, casual dating, or someone to split a two-bedroom apartment with because rent is outrageously high.
But what does this look like in the real world? asked young Indians navigating modern love what loud looking means to them—and yes, it turns out they actually prefer knowing what they’re getting into.
No More Wasting Time
“I spent most of my early 20s trying to 'go with the flow' because I thought asking for commitment made me look clingy. Now my bio says, ‘Looking for a serious relationship. Not here to waste time.’ If that scares someone away, great. That’s one less awkward conversation for me,” says 27-year-old accountant Megha Zaveri.
“I once went on three dates with a guy before he casually mentioned he was moving abroad in a month. That’s when I realized I need people to be upfront. Now, I say exactly what I’m looking for: ‘I want a relationship, but I also want a partner who respects my independence.’ Being clear is actually really attractive on both men and women,” says Delhi-based Riya Nanda, a social media executive.
What Is Loud Looking?
At its core, Loud Looking is simple: be upfront about what you're looking for in a relationship. No more vague, non-committal phrases like “I’m just going with the flow” or “seeing what happens” unless, of course, that’s exactly what you’re looking for.
Think of it as putting the “intentions” tab right at the top of your dating résumé. Want a serious relationship? Say it. Just looking for casual fun? No shame in that... just be clear.
A Return to the Pre-App Days
While Loud Looking might sound like a new phenomenon, it’s really just dating before dating apps took over our lives. Over a decade ago (let’s say, pre-2012), people met through friends, at college fests, or at weddings where your aunt tried to set you up with a nice software engineer. They didn’t have the luxury of endless swipes, so conversations got real pretty fast.
“If you think about it, our parents’ generation was the OG Loud Lookers,” says Ameya B, a graphic designer from Bengaluru. “If someone was looking for marriage, they didn’t shy away from saying it. Even in college, if a guy wanted to date casually, he’d say it outright. We’ve just complicated things with the whole ‘chill but not too chill’ approach.”
How To Do Loud Looking Right
Of course, saying what you want isn’t enough, you’ve got to say it the right way. Here’s how to master Loud Looking without scaring people away:
- Be Direct, Not Intimidating – Saying “I’m only looking for something serious, don’t waste my time” might be a little aggressive. Try: “I’d love to meet someone who’s also looking for something long-term.”
- Be Honest With Yourself First – Before broadcasting your needs, make sure you actually know what you want.
- Keep It Playful – Honesty doesn’t have to be boring. Try: “Looking for someone who can match my energy, steal my fries, and maybe commit to watching an entire TV series with me.”
- Don’t Be Afraid to Ask Questions – Loud Looking is as much about making sure you and your date are on the same page. “What are you hoping to find on this app?” is a great way to gauge compatibility early on.
- Walk the Talk – Loud Looking is more about following through. If someone tells you they’re looking for something casual and you want something serious, don’t assume they’ll change their mind. Respect people’s clarity, even if it doesn’t align with yours.
While some might argue that spelling things out takes the “mystery” out of dating, the reality is that no one has time for mystery anymore. Between side hustles, therapy sessions, and trying to drink enough water, the modern dater simply cannot afford to decode someone’s intentions through half-hearted texts and delayed responses.
For decades, dating has been a bizarre social experiment in how vague people can be while still expecting the other person to just know what they mean. Loud looking is a refreshing mix of honesty, confidence, and self-awareness that eliminates unnecessary heartbreak and confusion.
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