Is there a certain time period to wait to heal from losing a loved one? This is a difficult question to answer, but very important to ask. I personally get asked this question a lot, and my response is always the same: "It takes as long as it takes." Some people want to know exactly how long their recovery period will be so they can know when they've "gotten over" their loss.
It is okay to feel sad. There will be days when you will want to close all the blinds, lock yourself in a room and cryuntil you have no more tears left to shed. There will be days when you will forget all the happy memories and only remember the last time you saw your loved one, how they looked and smelled, how they made you happy and how their presence in your life made you feel warm and secure.
What is not okay to feel is any form of regret. Regret for all the things that you could not give to that person. Regret that you didn't even get to say goodbye. Regret that life did not turn out the way it was supposed to. All of these regrets can put you in a slumber that you will not be able to escape, so do not regret a thing!
Every day we hear about a new death in the news, someone who was just starting out in their life, or someone who was on the brink of dying from a terminal illness. These stories strike our hearts and make us feel something inside. We remember how it felt to lose a loved one and we wonder if the family affected feels the same way that we did. If you're reading this, then you might be having some difficulty coping with the loss of your loved one and are desperately seeking the journey to healing. Here are 3 tips that can help you through it:
Surrender to the experience and unveil
Surrender to the experience of your loss. Don't try to change it. Surrender to it being messy, lost, or incomplete. Surrender to the fact that life does go on, though not in the same way. Surrender to not being okay. In truth, no one can ever really "handle" a loss and often it affects you deeply, but what I wish more people knew was that our grief is more than okay, it's important. We all carry a story within us and sometimes those stories are heavy and painful. Your grief is a story that tells you more about the experiences of your life. Don't be embarrassed by it, don't run from it and don't let anyone tell you that you're weak for feeling it. It's okay to feel your feelings.